Sunday 31 May 2009

Which cigarette is the most awesome?




Happy smiley!

Sweet ecranoplane


Ecranoplanes are strange seaplanes that skim low on a cushion of air using the ground effect principle (how gulls cruise just above the water.) They were designed in Russia (google it, they made some monsters), but I spotted this little guy floating off a beach. High five!

Pain in the ASEAN



So there's this ASEAN conference going on in Jeju. Jeju is going apeshit for it. There are flags every 100 feet on every major road, on both sides. Marines are directing traffic. Annoying motorcades can be seen whizzing importantly past the little people several times a day, snarling traffic. Large James Bond villains in suits talk into their wrists and eyeball you as you walk past black sedans. Blackhawk helicopters chatter overhead. Navy destroyers loom offshore. Massive hovercraft storm the beach. Lines of police buses filled with bored 19-year old cops line the streets (what is this, Seoul?) The best/worst is the anti-aircraft missile battery set up in the middle of the Jumgmun resort area (didn't get a pic, as it probably would have resulted in a rubber glove search from homeland-uh security-uh.) One stupendous waste of money is the "Welcome to Jeju" sign spelled out in 20-foot high letters on the side of an oreum along a major bus route. It's visible from the road for about 3 seconds. The only good thing about the ASEAN conference is the neat flag. If this goes on much longer, I'M GOING TO ASSASSINATE THE PRIME MINISTER OF MALAYSIA!! (Zoolander...)

Thursday 28 May 2009

Seotal Oreum Massacre







There are a disturbing number of massacre sites on Jeju. Most of them are associated with the Korean war era, with the government and locals killing large groups of communist sympathizers. The Seotal Oreum massacre site is nestled behind an old Japanese airfield, and happens to be a good spot for birds (and apparently toddlers come here to pay their respects.) On this spot in 1950, 210 people were killed "without legal process" by government forces and buried in a big crater. It felt heavy here. Heavier still was when I found a bullet on the ground while birdwatching. It was military calibre, and it was deformed like it had hit something. It's very possible this bullet killed someone. I left it there.

Wednesday 27 May 2009

Jej-scenic

I like the southwest coast of Jeju, it's rad.


Tuesday 26 May 2009

Presidential suicide

Media-hounded South Korean ex-president Roh Moo-hyun committed suicide this week by jumping off a cliff. I was in Korea for 2 years of his term, and I kinda liked him (I'm not a huge fan of current president Lee Myung-bak.) He was born to a peasant family, and he enjoyed wearing plaid shirts. I though it was neat when he gave Kim Jong-Il a whole collection of DVDs and a nice shelving unit to put them on last year. I saw this simple memorial to him today next to a bank.
Something else happened in Korea this week, but I forget what it was.

Sunday 24 May 2009

Scoot n shoot


Nothing says summer like automatic gunfire. Tell yo momma to buy a black dress! Bop bop!

Supposed to be good luck



When a bird craps on you, that's good luck. Thank you Blue Rock Thrush, for crapping your stinging white luck on me while I was watching you from below.

Saturday 23 May 2009

Still guiding my spirit



And eating well. Loves my Blue Rock Thrushes, and they loves me back, and guides me. They make most of my important decisions.

And let's not forget about the saxoma-beer

Friday 22 May 2009

Sexy, like a violin filled with beer


And the beer also makes you thin, and is chock full of fibre.

Funny caption contest


Best caption wins a high five.

Cat on a stick, meow


Or at least that's what I call it. I honestly couldn't say if the source animal for this delicious stickmeat had hooves, paws, or wings. Good call Optimus.

This sums up my week pretty well and I like it too

Hey monks, move those damn pallets already.

I am Russell Crowe (tyrann-E-saurus inside joke)

Thursday 21 May 2009

Kidffiti






Found some creepy childish graffiti in an abandoned orchard house. This is definitely how horror movies start. I felt like those creepy kids from the original Star Trek episode 'And the Children Shall Lead' were watching me. That or the Mothman. Or worse case scenario, Children of the Corn.

Wednesday 20 May 2009

Kwong


This is what Pheasants looks like when I'm not eating them.

Cleavage


Still on the subject of Home Plus ( me P us), I bought some cheap t-shirts there, thinking and hoping they would turn out normal. My hopes were met with grief and anguish. A:The cleavage on the package seems only to be an artist's impression. The actual neck-line is sadly much more plunging and revealing. B: After one wash, the bottom hem of the shirts miraculously shrinks north by a half foot, exposing my mid-riff. This might look good on Daisy Duke, but I just want a manly Marlon Brando shirt. Why is life so hard?

Maxin' Ajummas


I've seen seen these old ladies maxin' and relaxin' in Home Plus demo spine-melter chairs on more than one occasion. I suspect they sit there all day, getting their spines melted and their feet relaxed. Good for them, I say.

Tuesday 19 May 2009

Craptop up


So I just found out that my craptop works, although I have lost everything that was on it. Eh, whatever. Neat chair.

Monday 18 May 2009

Most awesome Korean of the year award



Goes to this guy. Hands down.

Wee spiders


These had better not be monstrous Golden Orb Weavers, because they freak me out. All big and yellowy and big.

Cop scoot



Same same! Hee hee!

Campin' too






We camped on a beach in the shadow of the scenic and over-touristed Seongsan. We watched a steady stream of tour buses roll in and out of Seongsan. Crappy way to see the island - get out, take pictures for 20 minutes, get back on, get out, eat at kick-back restaurant, get back on, repeat for 4 days. I always notice that within a 10 minute walk of most tacky or obvious places the buses stop, there are at least 3 other amazing little places where the tour buses don't stop. They are as scenic, or more scenic than the regular stops. This is fine with me, because it means that they are always empty. Anyways, get off the stupid tour buses for good, people, clearly I know best.
We got these cheap-o camo tents off the net, and man were they cheap - kinda like play tents, but they got the job done. Problem with these tents is that they came peg-less, which explains why I woke up in the middle of an intense midnight gale to find the top of the tent touching my face. The beach barbecue was epic.
Not to self: I'm never drinking soju again.
I won't even tell the story about how I fixed my sandy hair up with soju, snuck into a nearby resort, and proceeded to stagger around and talk to people, charmingly convincing them that I was indeed a paying guest. I eventually found what I was looking for - pristine shining commodes, and delicious if somewhat front-loaded convenience store sandwiches.

Campin'



Went on an epic scoot/camping trip on Friday with Cobain. We were pretty well loaded down with gear, and our insistence on sticking to the scenic coastal roads on the way there meant a 2.5 hour trip on closed roads, old roads, small roads, rocky roads, bad roads, non-existent roads, and creepy roads. Would have been better with a dirt bike, and no gear, but we made it. At one point I stopped at a sewage treatment plant to check for reed warblers for a few minutes, and when I got back, Cobain was getting mobbed by a whole assload of little K kids. Look at the vanilla man, no paint! Where did they come from? Why were they all hanging out in the parking lot of a remote sewage plant? Those things are not for me to know, only to wonder about.