Tuesday, 15 May 2012

Japandemonium - Happy sunshine super robot capsule hotel!

One size fits all

Home sweet coffin

Omigod!  I've just woken up - what year is it?  Have we reached Ursa Major yet?

We will refuse the eating and drinking in the capsule hard. 
 No trip to Japan is complete without a stay in a capsule hotel.  This one was the biggest in Osaka, and had the feel of a hostel - the one I stayed at last time was much smaller, and was more of a hive for rumpled Japanese businessmen.  It's a bit disconcerting to be surrounded on all sides by the sounds of rustling, snoring, and farting Japanese businessmen.  I was going to say 'comforting', but that's not quite the case.
  This one was a pretty confusing operation, even by Japanese standards.  The capsules, sauna/showers, and locker room were all on different floors.  On each floor you visit, you're meant to surrender a further layer of your clothes and possessions, in exchange for another key.  In the lobby, you surrender your shoes to the shoe locker.  You then go downstairs and lock your clothing in a locker in exchange for a set of spiffy brown pyjamas.  Then you go up two floors to the shower room, where you leave your pyjamas and toiletries in another locker, and head butt-ass nekkid into the sauna area, where Japanese men invariably stare at your genitals with steely seriousness.
  Well, all of this nonsense confused me a bit in the morning.  A hazy morning, we'll say.  I got all mixed up in the locker room, because I came in already wearing the pyjamas.  I stripped naked and headed out...into the lobby crowded with folks checking out.  I stopped, raised my finger as if I'd forgoetten something, and headed back in to put back on my pyjamas.  Fail.
  I kept the pyjamas by the way.  I'm wearing them now, in fact.

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