Thursday, 30 June 2011

The ramyaghetti!

Step 1: Get a box

Step 2: Open and display

Step 3: You poke some holes in that lid

Step 4: Eat, then deal with junk-food regret for an hour or so
The folks that make the Kraft Dinner clone in a waxy bowl (I ate one today and I'm not proud) also make several other 'waterless' noodle dealios.  I'd get more nutrition eating newspapers and pencil shavings, but damned if they don't taste like the dickens.  My clothes smell like must, nothing dries in raintown.

The leg!

Like a dope, I burned my leg on my red-hot muffler the other day.  It went 'tssssssss!', and smelled like sweet sweet BBQ.  Well, it got infected.  So I rolled into the grungiest hospital this side of Bangkok, took two shots in the ass (my favorite!), and underwent a brutal cleaning.  I can't really complain, as two tough chicks I know have recently endured 1,000,000 times worse vis-a-vis their legs.  My ass is numb.  Also, I bet it's gonna hurt like a bitch to rip off that hair-bandage.  I'm not whining, I'm just making conversation.  It's raining.

Wednesday, 29 June 2011

The frog!

My name is Kotakji.
  Jeppuh lives 10 floors up, so I was surprised when he called on the weekend to inform me that a frog had gotten into his apartuh.  Not just any frog, a sexy Japanese Tree Frog.  It jumped around and stuck to people's faces, it was righteous.  This damn thing was jumpin' all over the damn place.  I'm still trying to figure out how it got into his apartment.  His window was open, it was typhoony, and the thing had suction cup hands, so it may have blown up and stuck onto the apartment?  Hitched in on a backpack?  It's a mystery.  Frog rain?  Anyhow, it was released the next day, after we had our fun with it.  Sadly, it refused to eat a wounded mosquito we presented it with.  UNLEASH THE FURY!
 Anyhowzees, just got back from eating proper meat, plotting now.  Plot...plot...plot...

Madness - Night Boat to Cairo

It's...cloudy.  Gotta love the Madness!  I can promise you I've only 'danced' a handful of times in my life, and when I do, I look just like these guys, only way less coordinated.  No sleep for the wicked these days.

Monday, 27 June 2011

My last pig spine?

Caveman good

Soak up the leftover stew with rice?  Yes please.
Went to get some obscenely perfect pig spine stew tonight, with some south-siders.  Best siders.  North-side, harumph.  Is this the last time I eat pig spine?  Gosh, if I had a nickel for every time I've had to say that in my life.  Bring on the maudlin.  It's raining.

Bruce Springsteen - Glory Days

Ok, Bruce put it pretty well.  Put this in your face!

Prince Buster - Hard Man Fe Dead

Listen to it.  If you've got the time.
Also, is the grass always greener in the past?  The 'good ol times', the 'old school', 'back in the day', Napoleon Dynamite's uncle...why are we always so goofily nostalgic for past glories, but often waste the present/fail to appreciate it, or give up altogether?  Deeeeep.  I'll let you know where I fall, next year around this time.  I think right now is the good ole times, personally.  Holy shit, bedtime.  Glory days!  Days of glory!

My other park

I've been ticking a lot of boxes lately, to my surprise.  'Second to last' this, 'Possibly the last time' that.  Man, maybe I have a heart after all.  Or, maybe not.  I'm probably confusing imminent-uproot-anguish with heartedness.  So this is my other park, good for green-green rain-walking through.  It's raining now, as a matter of fact.  Seogwipo, a hard place to leave.  Strewth, chincha.

Sunday, 26 June 2011

All-you-can-eat raw tuna

Giant fish-uh gonna crush-uh yo' shitty lil' rocks-uh!

He knows the shit out of raw tuna.

It's raw!  It's tuna!  It's raw tuna!

It's jaw!  It's tuna!  It's tuna jaw!
It's badass.  The only dumb thing is the name of the restaurant, 'Dokdo Tuna'.  Dokdo is Canadian!  Well, I guess it's also dumb to eat tuna, which is a species on the verge of checking out.  Ah well, eat it now, before it's gone!


  My dawg Jeppuh had a flat tire.  We went to get it swapped, and by the time we got to Tire Town, he was riding on rims like a crackhead on COPS.  It was an adventure.  An adventure I tell you!
  It's not raining.

A Friday

Not me - another balding guy

Keepin' it real!

Sky candy

In the free world

Pounding on doors and Flaming Lips at 4 a.m.

Don't ask
  Friday was swell.  Some ladies and I played some songs in an open mic showdown at an arty cafe around the corner.  We played under the name 'Pipikdoyo', which of course means 'Green Sandpiper' in Korean.  We ended up winning, and got 50$ in booze for our troubles.  Oh yeahhh(Kool-Aid Man style)!  We then rounded up the posse and rolled on down to a little bar in the harbor, where we drank, shot fireworks, and jammed until about 5 a.m.  Then on Saturday it rained and winded.  Typhoon and all.  Some interesting new folks in Seogwipo these days, just in time for me leaving.  That's how she goes.
  On a side note, I have a friend with a terrible secret wedged behind the wall outside the bathroom of the cafe.  He went to go pee, sharted in the process, realized there were no shit-tickets, geared-down, used his undies to cleanse himself, and finally hid his besoiled breeches deep behind the wall outside the bathroom.  I bet whoever finds them one day will cry.

Korean Kraft Dinner

It's called 'Cheese Bokki'.  Actually, not 'Cheese', but 'Chee-juh'.  It's pretty damn close to Kraft Dinner.  You put in the hot water and let it soak, as you would with a normal ramyan, then you poke four holes, drain out the water, and dump in the magical cheese powder stuff.  Pure garbage, but tastes good when you're starvin'.

Thursday, 23 June 2011

Broken record

Garbage?  Garbage.  Garbage!

Swept away

Please, sweep us all into the sea. 

Typhoon Meari is inbound this weekend.  Wait - loads of rain?  Shitty weekend weather?  Meh, I'm not sweatin' it, we've all had a lot of practice.  Foggy tonight.  Like.  P.S. It's raining.  Rage against the rain!  With a pocket full of shells.

My park

 I went for a rain-walk in my park the other day, I'm trying to soak in as much classic Seogwipo stuff as I can lately, but I know it's gonna sting hard to leave this place.  It's my park.  I've seen many a lifer here, and there are some good regular birds here too.  Also, I enjoy lurking and chilling in my park.  It's quiet.  It's green.  It's raining.
  Can't really sleep these days.