Wednesday 8 December 2010

Soggyton/The mysterious case of the exploding Big Mac

Sexy

Classic

Snowy
Sunbursty

Wee Sog

Can you hear the dog farm just off camera?

Fooosh!

I know a guy that threw a Big Mac at a wall once.  Someone he knew died, so he went on a week-long Bokbujaju bender (see my Jan '10 Korean liquor review for more info y'all...Feb for a Korean 'beer' review). Bokbunjaju is Korean raspberry wine that ain't half bad if you don't mind having ever-red lips and fits of random aggression.  Worried, I check in on him and he's wacked out of his fuckin' head, so I take him over to Mickey D's for some regenerative burgery goodness.  We ordered, and stood there swaying and waiting.  The fry thing beeped, so he calmly walked behind the counter, pulled the fry thing out of the oil and hung it up, as it's meant to be done.  The girl runs over, and, even though the fries were done, threw them back into the oil and glared at him, to emphasize the magnitude of his unholy transgression.  He walked back and pulled them out and hung them up again, because they were done.  He then picked up the Big Mac that was sitting on his tray, and whipped it at the wall, while making a sound that fell somewhere between a rebel yell (he WAS from Arkansas) and a Bruce Lee 'Haaaaayyyyyyy'.  It exploded perfectly and in slow motion, leaving a special-sauce frag pattern, while lettuce and waxed paper drifted slowly to the floor.  We wisely left, but I'd have paid good money to see that security camera footage.  Stay awesome, Ham King, wherever you are.

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